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Intervention: Aretha Franklin



Oh Aretha. Pipes of Gold. Queen of Soul. Boobs of a National Geographic special.

Honey, please. I know you're a legend and you can afford to do whatever you want, but your girls are crying out for attention. They're depressed. They need something uplifting. And don't even get me started on the back problems poorly supported chests can cause.

Given your propensity toward spaghetti straps, I understand the logic behind not wearing a conventional bra. I even applaud your decision to stay classy and leave exposed bras to joggers and Britney Spears, but there's a foundation garment out there just begging you to wear it.

If you're wearing something conservative, like a suit or a more casual dress, a nice, supportive bra with thick straps and a wide band should be right up your alley -- the band is the most important part of the bra and should do 90% of the... perkifying. Try the Glamourise Magic Lift Full-Figure Support Bra, which goes up to a 58J and is available via largesizelingerie.com in Lilac and White.

However, for your ubiquitous (and very chic) evening looks, a longline bra or bustier will be a better option. Try the Goddess smooth long-line bra available at Roamans.com in white, ivory and black up to a 48FF.

Aretha, you are a Queen amongst mere peasants. But please, show your ladies some R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

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